Chapter 9 - NATHAN’S VERSION OF LOVE
Nathan was permitted one supervised video call.
Jenna did not want Lila to take it.
The caseworker said the decision should belong to Lila.
Lila said yes.
For an hour beforehand, she changed shirts twice.
Then asked if her hair looked messy.
At six o’clock, Nathan’s face appeared on the tablet.
He looked tired.
Unshaven.
Smaller somehow.
“Hey, peanut.”
Lila’s eyes filled immediately.
“Hi, Dad.”
“I miss you.”
“I miss you too.”
Jenna sat across the room.
The caseworker remained beside the tablet.
Nathan smiled.
“Are they treating you okay?”
Lila nodded.
“Aunt Jenna got me a lamp.”
“Oh.”
Something moved across Nathan’s face.
“She always buys things when she wants people to like her.”
Jenna started to speak.
The caseworker lifted one hand.
Lila looked down.
Nathan continued.
“You know I never meant for you to get hurt, right?”
Lila’s fingers twisted together.
“The box hurt.”
“I know.”
“You said it wouldn’t.”
“I didn’t think it would.”
“You taped it really tight.”
Nathan looked toward someone off-screen.
“Your dad was scared.”
Lila said nothing.
“Sometimes adults make choices when they’re scared.”
Another silence.
Then Nathan leaned toward the camera.
“Everything I did was to keep us together.”
Lila looked confused.
“What about Mommy’s money?”
The room changed.
Nathan stopped blinking.
“Who told you about that?”
“Aunt Jen.”
Nathan laughed softly.
“There it is.”
The caseworker said, “Nathan—”
“She’s poisoning you against me.”
Lila flinched.
Jenna stood.
The caseworker immediately intervened.
“Nathan, this call is for Lila. Do not discuss allegations against other family members.”
Nathan ignored her.
“Lila, listen to me. That money was mine to manage.”
“It said my name.”
“You’re seven.”
Lila looked at Jenna.
Nathan noticed.
“Don’t look at her. Look at me.”
The caseworker reached toward the screen.
Nathan spoke faster.
“You had a house because of me. Clothes because of me. Food because of me.”
Lila began crying.
“And now everybody’s acting like I stole from you?”
The caseworker ended the call.
The screen went black.
For several seconds, Lila stared at her own reflection.
Then she whispered something Jenna would remember for years.
“Was I expensive?”
Jenna crossed the room immediately.
“No.”
“He said I cost money.”
“Every child costs money.”
Lila looked up.
“Is that bad?”
“No.”
Jenna sat beside her.
“Feeding you is not a favor. Buying you shoes is not a loan. Keeping you safe is not something a parent gets to charge you for later.”
Lila stared at the dark tablet.
“What if he thinks it is?”
May you like
“Then he’s wrong.”
For the first time, Lila did not defend him.
