Chapter 6 - My Perimeter
I made Elena miserable for nearly a month after the gala.
Not intentionally.
That does not make it better.
I installed a new security system at home.
Changed drivers.
Required advance guest lists.
Asked restaurants to bring unopened bottles to the table.
Wanted her office screened before events.
Elena tolerated it for nine days.
On day ten:
“No.”
“What?”
“No more.”
“Elena—”
“I am not living inside a protective detail.”
“Someone drugged you.”
“My brother drugged me.”
“Exactly.”
“That does not mean every waiter in Manhattan is a threat.”
I hated how reasonable she sounded.
“What do you want me to do?”
“Ask.”
“I am asking.”
“No. You are announcing security procedures and calling the announcement a question.”
That was fair.
I became angry anyway.
“I watched you collapse.”
“I know.”
“I held you while you stopped responding to me.”
“I know.”
“And I am supposed to act normal?”
She softened.
“No.”
Then:
“But your fear does not automatically become authority over my life.”
There it was again.
Owen’s mistake in a different key.
I did not like the comparison.
Which meant I needed to hear it.
My actions were not equivalent to his.
I was not drugging anyone.
Not falsifying records.
Not restraining Elena.
But the emotional logic could rhyme.
I’m afraid.
Therefore I decide.
My father’s death had taught me that unseen hazards kill.
So I became a man who searched for hazards.
Useful.
Until every person I loved started becoming part of the perimeter.
Our counselor asked me:
“What would protection look like if Elena retained the final decision?”
I disliked her too.
Apparently my life involved expensive women asking correct questions.
We made rules.
For major public events, professional security planning.
Shared.
Not dictated by me.
No staff surveillance beyond normal venue practice.
No food or drink rituals that made Elena feel like evidence.
If she wanted me beside her, I stayed.
If she wanted five minutes alone, I did not turn alone into vulnerable.
And I apologized for shoving Noah harder than necessary.
That surprised Elena.
“He was trying to destroy evidence.”
“Yes.”
“You think pushing him was wrong?”
“I think stopping him was right.”
Pause.
“And I think I enjoyed the force for half a second because I was terrified.”
That distinction mattered to me.
Violence can be necessary in a moment.
Enjoying the permission it seems to grant you is something else.
May you like
I did not want fear turning me into a man who always found a reason to take control.
Especially not while criticizing Owen for exactly that.
