Chapter 4 - MY MOTHER’S FIRST APOLOGY
Mom came into my hospital room three hours later.
Her eyes were swollen.
Daniel stood behind her.
Uncle Ray was not there.
That told me Daniel had finally used the authority in his voice that morning for something besides calling 911.
Mom sat beside my bed.
“Emma.”
I looked toward the window.
“I’m sorry.”
I said nothing.
“I thought you were anxious.”
Still nothing.
“I didn’t know.”
That finally made me turn.
“You didn’t ask.”
Her face crumpled.
“I know.”
“No. You decided.”
“Emma—”
“You decided I was pretending before you even looked at me.”
Daniel put one hand on Mom’s shoulder.
Not controlling.
Steadying.
She started crying.
“I’m sorry.”
I wanted to forgive her immediately.
That surprised me.
She was my mother.
I loved her.
Seeing her cry still activated something inside me that wanted to make everything easier for her.
But I was lying in a hospital because the night before I had asked an adult whether I needed medical help and that adult decided I was inconvenient.
So I did not comfort her.
Not yet.
Daniel pulled a chair closer.
“The doctor said they caught it.”
I nodded.
“They’re treating it.”
Another nod.
Mom reached for my hand.
I let her touch my fingers.
But I did not hold hers back.
Then Caleb appeared at the doorway.
He looked smaller than fourteen.
I smiled.
He ran straight to the bed.
“You scared me.”
“Sorry.”
“No.”
He wiped his eyes angrily.
“Don’t say sorry.”
That sounded so much like him that I almost laughed.
Then he looked at Mom.
His expression changed.
“You should’ve listened.”
Mom closed her eyes.
“I know.”
“You always say she’s dramatic.”
“Caleb.”
Daniel’s warning was gentle.
But my brother did not stop.
“She told you last night.”
“I know.”
“And this morning.”
“I know.”
“You said she was pretending.”
Mom started crying harder.
Part of me wanted Caleb to stop.
Another part wanted someone to finally say every sentence out loud.
Because this had not started that morning.
That was the part Mom had not understood yet.
May you like
She had been dismissing me for years.
The hospital had simply created the first consequence nobody could laugh away.
