Chapter 15 - The Camera Turned Toward Us Again
Three weeks later, Hawthorne held its fall open house.
Daniel came separately.
We were not calling what we were doing a separation.
We were also not pretending he had simply moved back in.
He slept at the house three nights a week.
Sometimes on the couch.
Sometimes upstairs.
We had stopped performing certainty for Sophie.
Walter did not attend.
His trustee badge no longer opened the security office.
Eric had made sure of that.
Leah almost skipped the open house.
Mia asked to come.
So they did.
I saw them across the courtyard first.
Mia wore a red jacket.
Sophie saw her a second later.
“Can I go?”
The answer rose in me.
Wait.
Stay where I can see you.
Who is with her?
I looked at Leah.
She was twenty yards away.
She raised one hand.
Not a wave exactly.
Permission to acknowledge each other.
I looked at Sophie.
“Stay in the courtyard.”
She nodded.
Then ran.
Halfway across, she slowed.
Mia had stopped too.
For a strange second, both girls stood waiting for the other one to decide.
Then Sophie called:
“You coming?”
Mia rolled her eyes.
“You’re the one running.”
They met in the middle.
No hug this time.
They started arguing about something on Sophie’s phone.
Daniel came up beside me.
He stayed several feet away.
“Hi.”
“Hi.”
He looked toward the girls.
“Leah okay with this?”
“She came.”
“Right.”
He caught himself.
No need for me to certify her feelings.
We stood.
Then the motor above the alley wall whirred.
My body tightened before I could stop it.
The same security camera rotated.
Its lens passed over the courtyard.
Then toward us.
Daniel saw my face.
“So did I.”
The small indicator light came on.
Sophie noticed too.
She looked up.
Mia stopped talking.
For one second the entire first afternoon came back.
The alley.
The torn food bag.
A male voice ordering me to leave a child where she sat.
The speaker remained silent.
Eric had told me the system now ran automated tracking during open events.
No trustee override.
No secret microphone.
Still, I watched.
The camera turned away.
Mia exhaled.
Sophie said something to her.
They started walking toward the art building.
Leah approached us.
Daniel straightened.
She stopped near him.
“Hi.”
“Hi.”
No hug.
No reunion.
Daniel looked at Mia.
“Can I say hello?”
Leah shrugged.
“Ask her.”
He did.
Mia looked at him.
Thought.
Then walked over.
“Hi.”
Daniel smiled.
“Hi.”
She did not hug him.
He did not reach.
“Mom says you might come bowling.”
Daniel looked at Leah.
Then caught himself before the answer went through her.
He looked back at Mia.
“If you invite me.”
Mia considered this with great seriousness.
“I invited Sophie.”
“That seems fair.”
She nodded and went back to my daughter.
Leah almost smiled.
Daniel looked at me.
“I found something in Mom’s basement box.”
My stomach tightened.
He noticed.
“Not the calendar.”
“What?”
“A photograph.”
“Of?”
He hesitated.
Then:
“Peter.”
Leah turned.
Daniel continued:
“With my mother. And Michael.”
Leah’s face changed.
“When?”
“Before you lived with us.”
She stared.
Daniel took out his phone.
Did not open the photo.
“Do you want to see it?”
Leah looked toward Mia.
Then at me.
Then at Daniel.
For a moment I could almost see the old machinery trying to start.
Who knows first.
Who protects whom.
Who interprets.
Who decides what another person is ready to know.
Leah held out her hand.
Daniel placed the phone in it without opening the image.
She stared at the dark screen.
Did not unlock it.
Not yet.
Across the courtyard, Sophie and Mia disappeared through the art-building doors with a group of students.
My first instinct was to follow.
I stayed where I was.
Leah looked at the phone.
Daniel looked at her.
I looked toward the building where our daughters had gone.
Above us, the camera rotated back toward the alley.
The speaker did not click on.
Leah finally pressed her thumb to the screen.
Then stopped.
“Claire.”
I looked at her.
“If that photo changes who Peter is…”
She didn't finish.
I understood what she was asking.
Or thought I did.
That was dangerous too.
So I said:
“I don't know.”
Leah stared at me.
Then gave a small nod.
Daniel's phone remained locked in her hand.
From inside the art building, Sophie shouted for Mia to hurry.
Mia shouted back.
Leah looked toward the sound.
May you like
Then down at the screen again.
Whether she opened the photograph, I didn't see.
